Tuesday, July 31, 2007
~.++Ran++.~
His voice
Caring as always
He who lived in me
Shared the same body as I do
"Onii-san"
"Ran nii-san"
He's my big brother who doesn't leave me behind
The only one who held my hand
Through everything
Sunday, July 29, 2007
~.++Underground LESSON H.E.L.L 4++.~
Underground LESSON H.E.L.L. 4: Nature Law of Balance
Qns: Why don't I have everything?
Ans: You should know why.
Nature law of balance.
The equilibrium.
Gain and loss.
Sow and reap.
That's the thing is all about.
You give what you get.
Only trash like rotten humans never learns.
Just die.
Such thing is too much for trash.
Saturday, July 28, 2007
~.++Next Full Moon++.~
I know I'm no different compared to a beast
From that day onwards
I'm no longer who I really was
Carries the inhuman blood
With the instinct of a beast
Which I don't even need a heart
Using a rotten vessel
Able to live on without feeling guilty of anything
It no longer matters whether am I still depressed or not
It doesn't matter whether am I lonely or not
It has no link whether am I the only one who wished to die
I don't even care whether am I the only silly moron who think as the only one who is unfortunate
I'm just a beast which escapes death
Having the urge to live on
To see the next full moon
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
~.++"You"++.~
Crystallized tears dissolved in your warmth....
Gentle hands....
Awakening voice....
I could be searching for someone like "You"
Whom I believed as miracle
Monday, July 23, 2007
~.++Tormenting++.~
For some reason,
the pain today is killing me.
As though someone is grabbing hold of my heart.
I can't feel the blood running in my blood vessels.
Is really painful.
Because I can't breathe.
Friday, July 20, 2007
~.++20.07.07, Summer, Sunny++.~
Today is lonely.
That's all.
I'm relieved and free.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
~.++My Perverted Nature++.~
I can't wait...
To see,
how his head got cut up,
stabbed on the forehead,
sliced and cut down,
open up the skull,
mashed up brain,
dug up eyeballs,
washed my hands with the small fountain of blood.
Just a dream you see....
But is a all heated up and wet dream for me.
I was so excited last night.
Friday, July 13, 2007
~.++Application++.~
There's no requirement to apply for death.
Yet, there's requirement to apply for after death.
Heaven for being His boot licking lackeys.
Banished for eternity for not believing in Him.
He whom I despise and loved pushed me out of the realm,
will never be forgiven.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
~.++Insomnia++.~
I slapped her....
What's going on is that,
I could no longer hear voices and felt my heartbeat.
But just felt cold blood running in my veins.
I'm senseless when I go crazy.
She ran out but I'm still gasping for oxygen.
It's going to be a sleepless night. Tonight.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
~.++Struggling++.~
I'm older than I think who I am....
How much I wished that I won't turn into bad adults.
Stayed away from the bad mannered and hard world they faced.
Struggling within the small box.
Sunday, July 08, 2007
~.++I Knew++.~
Someday I might become those boring humans
Walking on the street aimlessly
I felt my world crumbles like puzzle pieces
Whenever I thought I'm just only 18
I pissed him off
I knew but I didn't apologize
It's something I need to do
I need a barrier
Before I commit the same mistake
It's better this way
Really....
Thursday, July 05, 2007
~.++Rememberance++.~
To my friend who passed away on the same day as today....
I kept my promise that you shall be the first and last.
My only last gift for you a year ago,
and my last love that I could give you....
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
~.++My Honesty++.~
The lullaby which was played before I fell....
made me cried before I hate.
My hatred made me regret,
yet caused me to feel empty.
Forgiven the pitiful soul to redeem my sin,
where my freedom lies to be relieved....
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
~.++Stepping Out++.~
What had kept me walked till now that I'm 18?
Sometimes kept on walking just makes me felt tired.
What if stepping out in an ordinary Sunday?
Thus, I would wonder....
could it be something which makes me feel reminiscing.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
~.++Rejection++.~
When He could do something extraordinary, He is known as God.
But when He commits mistakes, He is regard as human.
I'd rebelled because I love Him too much....
But His rejection always made me lonely.
